Things are going to be a little slow around here for this week.
I’m taking some time to handle personal things. Trying to plan time to see some out of town friends. Nursing my damn knee. AND! Putting up with Nezuko crazy ass. I also have these XL length nails on. They make typing a hassle.
If you’re reading this you will see the blog has a new layout. Is it permanent? Nah. I still want to tweak it a bit. I’m also thinking about a ✨rebrand✨. I want content creating to feel like a fun hobby, not a chore. At times I get in my head about every little thing. I’m really trying to get over that. Also as an introvert I’m finding that my time in front of the camera sure will run out. Or I’ll start overanalyzing the way my body is viewed on the internet and call it a day.
I’m 28 years old and I’ve been overtly sexualized ever since I was 12. Most of the time I just want to sit around and mind my business. Reading, playing the Sims, figuring life shit out.
I got this book in PR to assist my relationship with food. It’s not about dieting. It’s about being mindful and taping into the emotional ties we have with food. So far I’ve been doing well. I had to take a week off from any real physical movement. Didn’t enjoy that. I hit my knee on the pole because I didn’t completely believe in my movements. But, but, I’m less afraid of the pole. There’s a period where you feel like everything that can go wrong will. I had to learn to trust the security of my pole and trust myself.
I been killing that shit. So that slight hiccup I had really pissed me off. Today I did that same move again and again and again just because I could. Feels good when you finally get something down. Now all I need to do next is walk on air. 🙂
I have knee pads and these really cool socks I’m gonna tell ya’ll about next week. So I have quite a bit of cushion for floor work. I’m trying my best to take it easy, but I spent two hours on the pole last night. Even as I type this right now, I’m wondering if I can get a full sesh in, and hell no it is 11:45 PM. I’m also realizing that some dates are coming up sooner than I expected. To keep it a buck with you chief, I don’t know if it’s dissociation or the amount of things going on. Could be both. Two things can be true at once.
My closet also needs cleaning like nobody’s fucking business. I could hardly walk in there. Depop and my friends will be seeing me. The amount of wigs I have? Insane. Plenty of new wigs and I just keep buying more. I’m going to take some slight inventory tonight while I pick out my last outfit for filming. Make note of any new storage I need. Things are going to get done.
Thank you for taking the time to read this one! I always appreciate all that stop by. The pole and the gym have been my therapy for the past month. Everything hurts and I love it. I might need to ice my knee a bit tonight. Got a wrap for it sssoo I’ll put that on in the morning.
I didn’t do my Spring cleaning, and I’m hoping that I can get to that this weekend. I just wanted a warm day to do it. Open up all the windows and light some Palo Santo. Simple tings. Anyway, I’ll see you next week babes💕
PAUSE! PAUSE! PAUSE! PAUSE! Before I end this, ya’ll know I gotta talk about SavageXFenty finally opening up stores, right? I teared up when I read the news. I didn’t want to get too excited. I didn’t want to go on day one either, to be completely honest with yah. I want to experience the store on a day as calm as can be. When I go ya’ll will surely be the first to know. 💕💕💕