This is a post that I’ve been working on for quite some time. Been my lil baby for a time, treat her gently
“Is hair on the body bad?”
No.
I have been led to believe that hair on the body is unsightly. Hair on the body should be shaved, waxed, or maybe one should even look into laser hair removal. Women, specifically, have been socialized to believe that hair on the genitals, arms, underarms, legs, anywhere that isn’t your head, should be removed. Although, hair on the head is not exempt from these “rules” or beauty standards we’ve been taught to follow. I know this all too well as a Black woman with 4C hair.
The hair on my head is short and soft like the hair of my mother. Like the hair of my grandmother. Growing up there were perms, ponytail hair pieces, micro-braids, and bundles. Sitting for micro-braids gave me the patience and endurance that I have today. I also had hair extensions that I would dye to look like raccoon tails or leopard print. Why yes, I was a scene queen.
During undergrad, it was bundles. Brazilian deep body wave. 20. 22. 24. I didn’t have a chance to fall in love with my hair until lockdown during covid. I had the time to sit with my natural hair. I found products that worked for me. A little avocado oil changed my life. Truly. I started wearing my natural hair out. Just showing up to the function with my little afro. At times I would be uncomfortable because I was still getting used to it. I would look to google, reddit, and YouTube with any question I had. I unabashedly asked friends about my ends, my edges, the body of my hair, whether they thought I needed a trim, shampoo and conditioner recommendations etc.. I was learning and I still am.
I also started playing around with wigs. Lace front wigs to be exact. I like the ability to instantly switch up a hairstyle. Also, I’ve never dyed my hair and I don’t think I ever will. It’s the ability to go from blonde to silver to pink all in one week and have no hair damage that does it for me. (And maybe that can be done with my natural hair! I just don’t care to go through the process.) Wigs are fun and I mention them anytime someone mentions changing up their hair. I’ve just recently cleaned out the wig section in my closet. Girl. I have bob, braid, buss down, wavy, straight, curls, blonde, black, silver, neon green, yellow, red, purple, blue, orange, magenta, pink, lilac, ombré, synthetic, human, blend. Nothing much to say here other than that I enjoy a good wig and have many.
The last wig I bought was a purple buss down for my playboy bunny Halloween costume. The very one in the featured image.
Present day, and I have my afro out at this very moment. I washed my hair last Wednesday after taking out my faux locs. I have a simple routine, shampoo and condition. I’ll do a deep conditioner (let sit for 20mins and then rinse it out) if it calls for it. Once I’m done, while my hair is wet, I section it off and braid. I allow my hair to air dry before I put my bonnet on and go to sleep. Once I wake up, I undo the braids and pick my hair. 9/10 I leave my pick in my hair to fluff my afro throughout the day. I also have a hairdresser that I see every now and then so trims are happening more often.
I’ve thought about completely shaving my head. Solely because I think it might help my hair grow out. I want a huge afro that can frame my face better without much manipulation from my own hands and products. As far as my hair stands now, it is growing just not as fast as I would like. I’m not running to find hair growth enhancers or reaching for the scissors. My hair is healthy and I feel really good about the current journey I’m on. I didn’t think I would open up this post and continue in such detail about the hair on my head.
Eyebrows? Those get waxed when I feel the need for it. When I feel like it. I’ve been getting my eyebrows waxed on and off for a few years now. Only one person touches my eyebrows because she knows the shape I like. A little wax, some plucking to clean it up, and I’m done. My natural brows look pretty decent to me. The only time I really concern myself with them is when I’m thinking about a makeup look that calls for specifics. I’ve never tried a thin brow, haven’t tried no brows (could achieve this look with makeup), nor have I tried threading. The eyebrows have simple upkeep if any at all.
This post was actually inspired by my armpit hair.
Last summer I stopped shaving my armpits. And I was wearing the tank tops, I was wearing the maxis, I was wearing the halters. I don’t usually wear strapless, but I would have/might wear that too. I wear deodorant and take my showers so my hair is not dirty. Hair on the body does not equal filth. I am not exempt from societal pressures that are placed upon women so I had and still have some anxiety when I walk out hairy in public (hehe). Anxiety that someone is going to think less of me because I don’t shave my armpits, but who gives a fuck? No one gives a fuck. And if they do give a fuck, their opinion doesn’t matter because it’s my body and I can happily do with it as I please. The hair on MY body does not affect anyone else. After going through shaving and waxing my armpits a few times I just gave it a rest.
I’ve only gotten my armpits waxed twice(???) Question marks because I’m not too sure, it was a rare occurrence. It was a “sure why not” when I was already laying on the table after getting a Brazilian wax. I’ll get to talking about that in a minute. As far as my actual arm hair, hair on my arms, I almost forgot to write about it in this post. I haven’t done anything with my arm hair in a while. No shaving. No waxing. Nothing. My arm hair exists as is.
Now about getting waxed. Yes! I get waxed every now and then. Waxing has been a part of my life for about 7+ years. (A Brazilian wax removes ALL hair from the genitals.) I have a post about getting waxed that you can read here. Long story short, I picked a place that I had been reading about, had a great experience, and bought a membership. Been locked in ever since.
For a while I was letting my bush (or pubic hair) grow out. About 6 months and I was back to a full bush I haven’t seen in a while. I loved it! It was so fun, it was erotic. The natural state of my body. A beautiful space in time, that was ended when I got a wax recently. Booked an appointment in the name of self-care and in a matter of minutes, my full bush that I had grown out for months was gone. Pussy completely exposed. No fur coat. Hairless cat. Sphynx.
No one told me I had to do anything, I decided to do this. I also have quite the amount of credits for my membership so I might as well use em whenever I can. When it comes to my pubic hair, I have received messages that this hair is unsightly, disgusting, and dirty. That is not true. It’s just hair. It’s been 4 weeks since my last wax and hair is starting to grow back. No idea when I’ll book my next Brazilian wax and I’m not worried about it.
Lastly, my legs. I have never waxed them and I think the last time I shaved was about 3 years ago. The hair on my legs isn’t that noticeable. Reminiscing about messages I received about hairy legs, I remember wanting to shave my legs for a middle school dance. I was only allowed to shave below the knee because shaving the entire leg basically meant that you were a harlot. Hair, or lack there of, on any part of the body is not an indicator of sexual activity. To be real with you I don’t have any thoughts about my leg hair. I might shave em for funsies, but it’s just hair. Hair that doesn’t consume my thoughts. It exists….and I allow it to exist.
There’s freedom in deciding what to do with the hair on my body. Even if I know some may react negatively. I don’t care. It’s not about anyone else but me. This hair doesn’t have anything else to do with anyone but me. It’s my hair, my nails, my face; I can do whatever the fuck I want. Just how you can do whatever the fuck you want.
Hiiiiiiii, thank you for reading! Thank you for visiting and spending time with me in this digital space. I really enjoyed writing this post. So much so that I sat on it for too damn long.😃
Lingerie Slayer 
Thoughts?