Started: 12/21/24
For the past two years I have been working towards my masters in human sexuality with a focus in sex education. Last Sunday (the 15th) marks my official completion of the program.
I’m done. I did it.
I did it.
The emotions are still settling. Grades were finalized Sunday afternoon. And just like that my time as a grad student has come to a close. After I did a triple take, I called my mom and then took myself out for a late brunch to celebrate.
Those two years flew by and I didn’t know what to expect upon starting. I knew that I didn’t have that much time and I wanted this college go-round to be different. So it was. I had the opportunity to challenge myself when it came to assignments. I wrote a paper on race play, and chile that is one of the best papers I’ve ever written. It was a literature review for a class. I was so nervous to start because I had never done one before. Thankfully the professor I had was amazing and helpful every step of the way. Through that experience I found out that I really enjoy research. It was a good jawn.
I want to be present with this achievement that I worked hard for. Plus it’s the end of the year so how much could I really do? (The most, but we’re not going to get into that.) I had classes in the spring, summer, and fall. I need an actual break where I don’t have to be on a deadline. I have so many books to read and I just downloaded Kingdom Hearts 3. In true introvert fashion I’m excited to get back to the intricate stories woven within my Sims 4 saves. The simple things.
I want to revel in this moment.
I also had the pleasure of attending the national sex ed conference last week and there was so much going on. In a good way! So many interesting people and so much to learn. I have notes that I still need to go over. Resources I need to sort through. I feel like I’m still riding that conference high. I look forward to attending more conferences in the future, and hopefully presenting one day.
Currently: 12/30/24
Aaaannd this is me revisiting this post. I’ve had time to ponder my journey as a grad student. The last few months were my personal end game. I knew there was only one outcome. As anxious as I was, there was comfort in knowing it was all coming to a close. Knowing that the minute I hit submit? It would be done. It would be over.
I remember taking out a solid hour to cry and worry to the fullest extent. The tears didn’t pour out of me like I expected. I managed to use a few tissues, and then I cozied up on the couch in silence. The sun set. My living room grew darker. Felt like I had been sitting there for hours. Once I finally looked at my phone it was around 7ish. The worrying was done.
Turned the lights on and got to it. Naming this as my personal end game gave me the energy to plow through. That and I had no choice but to do it. It was either that or everything I had been working towards just blips away.
The setting looked like this. Books creating a trail from my desk, to my coffee table, only to end on my couch. Me with my left leg tucked under myself, right one stretched out, and iPad in hand as I flipped through journal articles. Of course I would forget to stretch and pay for it later. For background noise I might have a documentary going or lilsimsie doing a build.
Going back and forth between the couch and my desk. Reminding myself that breaks were necessary and okay to take. Pacing back and forth with pen rattling in hand as I tried desperately to get my thoughts out. Trying to find the right words for academic writing. Appreciating Nezuko and her company. Whether it was laying on the couch with me or getting up in her cat tree right next to my desk.
Hitting submit for my final assignment. Well there was no confetti since it was turned in “late”. I already knew that was finna happen. I had an extension, so I was good, the system just doesn’t make space for that. I was too tired to jump for joy in celebration cause it was like 3 in the morning, AND grades weren’t going to be in until a few days so I was still anxious. And there I was attending the national sex ed conference bright eyed bushy tailed and anxious.
Final grades came rolling in that following weekend of the conference. (I know I’m just bouncing time around here and if it’s hard to follow I am so sorry. This is what happens when I start sumn’ and then return with more reflection.) I was in bed, refreshing the page a few times to make sure. I even went back and re-read the policy manual to make sure I was good to go. I text my best friend and called my mama.
The brunch I took myself on was so good y’all. An eggs benedict with breakfast potatoes on the side. Paired with a blueberry lavender lemonade. Exquisite.
And that closed my chapter as a grad student.
The celebration of self has been heavy and will continue into the new year.
I’m really thankful for all of the people that I’ve met during my grad time. I’m extremely thankful for friends and family that supported me along the way. I had a good friend of mine gift me a yoga subscription during my spring semester. I boo-hoo’d. I cried something serious because that was one of the kindest things anyone has ever done for me. She did her big one with that. I mention this become moments like that really pushed me through.
A professor telling me that my work was needed when I felt like everything I talked about was subpar. Boo-hoo’d in that moment too.
This post is only a small glimpse into what those two years were like for me. I’m not the same person I was when I started. Perhaps I’ll dive more into that on another post.
Heeeeeeeeeyyyy, did you miss me? Yeah yah girl was busy. The program was happening. Life was happening. Yeah.
I’m excited for the new year, despite its name already being soiled by Project 2025.
Another year of new challenges and opportunities.
Thank you for joining me and reading through. Happy New Year💕
Lingerie Slayer 
Thoughts?